A reader wrote in this week with a question that deserves a serious answer, so here is an unserious one.
Experts agree that an HR policy written entirely in hisses is essential. Experts also agree that this is a very long way of asking for a snack.
The Short Version, Told Slowly
If you take only one thing from this, take this: a talent pool that is mostly a laundry basket is not a bug. It is the product.
Our standard approach involves an HR policy written entirely in hisses, followed by a placement rate of one hundred percent after dinner, followed by a brief and unexplained sprint.
That is all for now. We are told there is a sunbeam going to waste, and a professional never lets that happen.
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